The one in January was especially unnerving, coming as it did so damn early in the year. It seemed to me like an omen, a welcome mat to mayhem and calamity. Just the fact that it was January was plenty bad enough, adding a Friday the 13th to the mix was plain mean.
Now, here it is, April, and winter is comfortably behind us. If you can call what we had a winter, it was more like an extended autumn or a really, really early spring. Why can’t they all be so agreeably temperate, that’s what I want to know. No blizzards or ice storms or snowdrifts or sub-zero temperatures, that would be bliss. Personally, I think winter is trying to kill me — every year.
But I digress, as usual.
So we’ve skated through two of this year’s Friday the 13ths, leaving only one to contend with in July — thirteen weeks away, give or take. Then it’s clear sailing until September, 2013. I don’t know about you, but I could use a breather from bad luck and unexpected curve balls. My coping skills, which aren’t so great to begin with, are stretched mighty thin. Transparently, tenuously thin.
Why, may I ask, is there no Dumb Luck Day on the calendar? Don’t you think there should be, say, a Tuesday the 6th or some such date when everything falls your way? When the lights all turn green at your approach? I do, but there’s no such thing. We have Friday the 13ths, we have the Ides of March, we have the entire month of February, and one Monday every week, but not a single scheduled Serendipity Day. That’s wrong.
We should write to the good folks at Hallmark, get them on the case. Heck, look what they’ve done for Valentine’s Day and Mother’s Day and Talk Like A Pirate Day. They can get a Lucky Break Day launched, I know they can. Let’s start mailing cards and letters right now to our appointed holiday representatives at:
P.O. Box 419034
Mail Drop 216
Kansas City, MO 64141-6580
Ask them to work their magic, mobilize their greeting card thinkers, and rescue the post office while they’re at it. Then go buy a stamp and head to the mailbox!
On a positive note, Harold Camping and the Mayans and Nostradamus and the doomsday preppers are lately exercising some restraint. They’ve issued no new predictions of apocalypse or end-of-the-world catastrophics in months. No news of space junk afoot in the atmosphere, either. May it ever be so.
Have a nice day : )
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