: for the last time, this isn’t pretty :

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You need to get that idea out of your head, okay?

This is winter and it arrived with the usual gifts: snow, sleet, and freezing rain, the full monty. All at the same time. It’s what they call a wintry mix at the weather bureau. And should not be confused with Chex mix, the holiday favorite. One is delightful, the other is dicey.

Thanks to the ghastly weather, my car’s entombed in a brittle, icy glaze, like a doughnut. Streets could pass as skating rinks. Trees look varnished. The sidewalks? Slick as snot. The landscape is straight out of Dr. Zhivago. Or maybe Neptune. In winter, earth seems as alien and otherworldly as deep space. It becomes an uninhabitable and forbidding place, cold and barren.

Is this what I get for Christmas, Santa? Really? This is the best you could do? I asked for curly hair and a marketable skill, not crappy weather. Oh, here’s a distressing thought:, maybe this is simply a taste of things to come. No, I can’t think that way. It makes my blood run cold.

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According to astronomical winter, we’re just beginning. Another 88 winter days lie in wait and, if history is any indication, they’ll be colder and snowier. Hard to believe since we’ll hit 6º below zero on Monday — a f-f-f-f-full 38 degrees sh-sh-sh-short of f-f-freezing. But don’t panic, by Tuesday temps soar into the double digits — 12º and each one is above zero.

On the bright side, the days will start to get longer now. More sunlight is on the way. Plus, I learned a new word, apricity. It’s archaic and long out of use, but means the warmth of the sun in winter. Isn’t that lovely? Apricity. That’s going on my Christmas list. Hear that, Santa? I want to exchange the ice and snow for a sleigh-full of apricity. Got it?

Copyright © 2013 Publikworks

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7 Responses to “: for the last time, this isn’t pretty :”

  1. roughbuncher

    I second your negative feelings about snow. I’ve had a similarly bitter rant about the stuff in one of my posts too. Glad I’m not the only one.

    RB

    Like

    • publikworks

      People who ooh and aah over how pretty snow is have a screw loose. It’s dreadful stuff, but I’m preaching to the choir, aren’t I? Thanks for the support, RB. We ought to start a club.

      Like

      • roughbuncher

        Yeah I do like to think of myself as a choir every now and then. No problem, it’s my pleasure. If I could solve my dedication and inactivity (more commonly called laziness) issues, starting a club would be a cup of tea, on a snowy winter day.

        RB

        Like

  2. FurthermoreAndSoForth

    We don’t have sub-zero temps here in the Northwest, but whoo there’s a scarcity of apricity. We have to start flipping on lights around 3:30 in the afternoon this time of year. Everybody is celebrating the beginning of “longer” days now that the solstice has passed. Yay! No turning on the lights ’til 3:31!

    Like

    • publikworks

      Oh,yeah? Well, today we have no degrees. None. It’s zero outside. Apricity now!

      Hang in there, Jo, only 75 more days until Daylight Saving Time. It’ll seem longer, but, honest, only 75 more.

      Like

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