: brace yourselves :

This is the captain speaking. Please prepare for an unscheduled landing, ladies and gentlemen. Our little flight of fancy has been diverted due to a sudden loss of altitude.

hindenburg

Our new destination is the record book: fewest visits ever this month. We’re witnessing history, you and I — along with one, possibly two other passengers. In the interest of full disclosure, however, publikworks’ first month saw lower numbers overall. That was in June of 2011, but it was only a partial month, not a full thirty days. It doesn’t count.

Time to reassess, boys and girls.

Not just what I’m doing or how I’m doing it, but why. I need to examine the motives here. If I’m in this for the numbers, I should quit. If it’s for fame, I should laugh. It can’t be the money, there’s none to be made. What then? I’ll be honest; I don’t have the first clue. Force of habit, maybe.

This is what I do, you know, what I’ve always done in some form or another most of my life. With varying degrees of success, obviously. In economics there’s a theory called the Law of Diminishing Returns, whereby the benefits gained are less than the money or energy invested. And I have to wonder, has publikworks reached that point? Have I? And I bike crashguess that depends on what benefit I’m expecting.

As a goal, stats are incredibly shortsighted. Big numbers are head-turning, low numbers are discouraging, but neither is proof of anything. Stats serve mostly as a distraction, I think. I’d like to ignore them, turn a blind eye, but can’t. They’re gruesome things, as morbidly fascinating as the scene of an accident, and I can’t look away. It’s sick, but there you have it.

Perhaps if I’d paid more attention to the work and less to the numbers, I wouldn’t be in this sorry state of decline. Or if I could figure out what I’m trying to accomplish by slogging away at this. Why do I bother? Well, maybe I’m hoping to find out what’s going on up there, in my head. I’m almost afraid to look, really, it’s a curiosity shop in there.

I need to step back, consider the options. Land-based travel, for instance, a scooter as opposed to aircraft. A nice, calm sailboat. Parking myself in the shade sounds good, too. Anything that gives my arms a rest, I’d like to stop the flap-flap-flapping. I refuse to limp along, though, scraping bottom.

I’d rather crash. There’s some dignity in that.

freefall

Copyright © 2015 Publikworks

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4 Responses to “: brace yourselves :”

  1. It's Just A Theory...

    Well, it could be for the exploration, as you say.
    It could be for the exercise in creativity – you know what they say; use it or lose it.
    It could just be for the sheer bloody-mindedness of it all; which is where I frequently find myself.
    But I mean… really?
    You’re letting the numbers get you down?
    If there’s no money, and no fame, then why let a little thing like numbers sink the ship.
    Especially in summer, when any and everyone who can has fled their normal habitat/home/cave for vacation.
    Hang in there.
    Keep on writing, and forget the numbers.
    I try not to follow my numbers.
    The only thing I DO try to follow is the maxim of trying not to give offense.
    Which is nigh-on impossible to do, these days.
    Someone’s always gonna insist upon being offended.
    Stil…
    It’s probably a losing battle, but I shall fight the good, um… fight…
    Perhaps you should, too…
    You’ve already got 12 likes on this post, and it’s not even a day old.
    I don’t think I’ve ever gotten to 12 within 3 or 4 days.
    It’s all relative, my friend.

    Liked by 1 person

    • publikworks

      You’re so reasonable, theory, and right on the nose. I’m just frustrated — with myself and my shortcomings, mostly. I want to be better at this or see some progress in that direction.

      Instead of working harder, I blame the stats page. That’s the cause. Stoopid, stoopid stats.

      Thanks for your insight and objectivity, I needed some. And you gave no offense. Keep fighting the good fight!

      Liked by 1 person

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