: hey, att, over here :

calCongratulations. You’ve been outed as the NSA’s #1 toady and stool pigeon. That’s quite an honor.

Yes, all telecoms assisted in government surveillance, but they didn’t go about it with anything close to the same eagerness and enthusiasm. They were slackers by comparison. AT&T was singled out by the NSA as “highly collaborative” with an “extreme willingness to help.” What did they do to earn such high praise?

Well, the company cheerfully handed over billions of emails — more than a million a day. They offered tech support to wiretap the goddamn United Nations headquarters, a customer. And brought in twice the financial support from the NSA as the next-most-enriched telecom. When asked to respond, an AT&T spokesman sputtered, “We don’t comment on matters of national security.” Ooh, good one.

Boys and girls, we’re never off the grid. Never. We’re being watched and tracked 24/7. We don’t need to carry a cell phone or use email, either. Heck, no. Do you use a credit card? Debit card? Do you go to the doctor? Have insurance? A library card? Go to the pharmacy? The mall?

Information from all those sources is readily available, providing an insider’s guide to the complete and very personal details of our daily lives. In metadata. That’s the stuff they contend is harmless, but is, in actuality, a gold mine.

Well, what can we do? We’re sitting ducks, powerless against the prying and snooping. No, we’re not. There’s an easy, obvious solution staring us in the face: pen and paper. Go back to letter writing. If you’re super-duper paranoid, use disappearing ink. Do something, for crying out loud. Fight back.


Here, use this. Fun, kicky paper designed to be opened like the fruit it represents. Peeled, in other words. Available in apple, banana, orange, and watermelon from A-maze paper on etsy.com. For best results, pay in cash. It doesn’t leave a trail. And good luck.

clown noseCopyright © 2015 publikworks

8 responses to “: hey, att, over here :”

  1. This is why I tell people all the time, do not send nekkid pictures via your phone.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Or computer. And don’t display them in your car windows as a sun shield, either. Nekkid, I like that.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Now this is wild! Once upon a time I worked for a certain politico, and at one of her fundraisers I got sucked in on a convo with her larger contributors…you guessed it…AT&T! Hoo wee..and yet, not that really shocked haha. Thanks for sharing :D

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve always suspected AT&T spends more on lobbying and buying politicians than on building a modern and reliable network. I could barely get a signal out of them.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. If the NSA or some other bunch of spies are going to insist on reading all my emails and monitor my every keystroke, couldn’t they at least make themselves useful and correct my spelling, punctuation and grammar errors? Spellcheck only gets so many.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s where they get stumped. If they were hidden and encrypted and in a deep, recessed file, they might come through, though.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I agree. I’m a rebel with a pen and paper. I still pay a lot with cash, until it becomes against the law.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Good for you, halfbaked. You’re using the old noggin :o)


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