Well, what did you expect? Summer’s over — theoretically if not officially — and with it went the grand, carefree lifestyle it brings.
Now, post-Labor Day, we must prepare for the ghastly thing called winter. Let’s get serious, people, our survival hangs in the balance. This is a familiar process, these preparations. We cover the patio furniture, drag the grill into the garage, drain the lawn mower, and gas up the snowblower. Hoping, praying, this is year we won’t need it, but knowing we will.
It’s practically an annual rite. We hunker down, targets in the crosshairs, and seek shelter in wool and fleece and goose down. Thus armored we await the harsh test of endurance that lies ahead: us vs. the elements. I don’t mean elements like you’ll find on the Periodic Table, I mean the elements: weather. Things like snowflakes — by the effing zillions — sleet and ungodly cold; icicles, polar vortexes, Alberta Clippers, and nor’easters. Against this onslaught, we resort to our big guns: Gore Tex. We’re not bloodthirsty, just cold.
But, on a positive note, it could be worse. We could live in Antarctica, the southernmost continent in the world. How much worse could it be? Oh, lots worse. For instance:
~ Most of Antarctica is covered in ice over 1 mile thick. (Although with global warming … )
~ If all the ice in Antarctica were to melt, sea levels would rise 200 feet — plus or minus.
~ About 90% of the Earth’s ice is located in Antarctica and 70% of the world’s fresh water.
~ There are no polar bears in Antarctica, but plenty of penguins and seals.
~ The coldest recorded temperature on this planet occurred in 1983 at Vostok Station in Antarctica, a brisk −128.6 °F. (−89.2 °C).
Boys and girls, winter this way comes. Run. Run for your lives.
Copyright © 2015 publikworks