We’re creative. There’s a difference. Oh, it’s hard to distinguish at times, but there’s a difference all right. Crazy is Sideshow Don, a lunatic wrapped in a nut job inside a personality disorder.
Creative is harmless and exhausting and, occasionally, fun, but it’s not insane. Harmless is good, I like harmless, fun is awesome, but the exhausting part is a drawback. Who actually looks forward to pounding away on ideas? I don’t. I love ideas, they’re exciting, but I dread the tweaking and revising and polishing and rewriting. I put it off until I’m desperate to post something new, then I’ll trot out a concept that’s grown stale after sitting unattended for so long. And it never turns out as good as I expected it to be. It’s very discouraging, although I should have learned to lower my expectations by now. I haven’t. My hopes continue to soar and their fall still hurts.
For me, writing is a tough slog, a long, frantic attempt to revive cold, lifeless thoughts. I think of it as idea CPR.
I’m successful only about 15% of the time (good thing I’m not an EMT, eh?). The other 85% I sulk and sigh and call myself names. Idiot, mostly, but I’m pretty prolific with the insults. Half-assed is a favorite, there’s also half-wit, dimwit, boob, moron, lamebrain, birdbrain, dope, hack, airhead, shithead, knothead, bozo, numbskull, loser, dweeb, well, you get the point. Creativity is hard, thankless freaking work.
What kind of person spends years working on something no one will ever see. I do. You do. Bunches of us can’t stop ourselves from putting thoughts into words — words that attempt to describe the craziness of life in a relatable, illuminating way. Of course, I happily settle for entertaining nonsense every chance I get; illuminating is way too ambitious. You’d need applied intelligence and logic to pull that off.
Even so, writing is what we do and who we are. But, I swear to God, some days I’d rather be a pirate.
copyright © 2018 the whirly girl
the whirly girl 
16 responses to “: we aren’t crazy :”
You are a star! I think being a pirate would be a blast. I’ll be on your crew. I’m thinking we won’t get far before the first mishap happens but then we’ll have something to write about.
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Woohoo, you’re my first mate, kiddo! What a wild adventure we’ll have! Just, please, don’t let me climb the mast or wear two eye patches.
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nothing you’ve written has failed to impress…this is one of the few blogs I read! I’m just imagining the even more stunningly, beautifully constructed stuff that could be produced by the little Whirly Girl waiting to emerge from behind the self-doubt….why throw self-doubting stones at the WG? All she wants to do is come out and shine…let her do it.
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Aw, what a terrific comment, thank you for the encouragement❣️ I feel better already and promise to try harder to quit punching myself in the head.
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I’m at the sulking, sighing stage right now haha so thanks for sharing
now let’s go get dat booty har har
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Woohoo, look out world, here we come 🙃
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And you are kind 🙏🏻
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Not at all, but I do have eyes 💁🏻♀️
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I want to say you’re way to hard on yourself, but I do the same thing to myself. What’s worse, when I actually DO create something kind of brilliant I thank the gods for dropping it to me from the sky. Can’t even believe I’m a credible artist. What’s THAT all about?!
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This is such a fragile process. I wonder if anyone feels confident when they’re working on new stuff? That would make me nervous; I’d think I was delusional 😳
PS. You are brilliant, by the way❣️
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I thought you were pretty good at navigating yourself through amusing and productive strings of thought. Or is that just the rigging? ;)
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That’s the rigging, Dave, the ropes and pulleys. Once in a while I do all right, but mostly I’m a stumbler. I thought it would get easier, but nope. One day I’ll figure this out 🤞
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You and me both! I take consolation that the best writers – Shakespeare and Chekhov, say – lurch around like drunk uncles at a wedding! :)
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I’m trying not to take the repeated failures seriously. After the first thousand times, it’s gotten absolutely hilarious. Watch out Guinness Book of World Records, here I come … 👍
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If at first you don’t succeed … try a different proverb! I like Sam Beckett’s take on it – ‘Fail again. Fail better.’ Though I have to say, your posts always strike me as successes …
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What a terrific quote and wonderful compliment! Thank you, Dave❣️
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