: can someone explain the super bowl to me? :


I know, it’s a football game. A weird, lopsided ball and a bunch of guys in helmets and pads knocking each other down. Touchdowns and end zones and field goals. I get all that. What I don’t understand is the fascination. Why? What’s so interesting about watching one guy run away from another guy? Is it because he has a dumb ball, is that it?

How much finesse is required to shove somebody to the ground? Heck, I could do that. As long as they’re smaller and don’t see me coming. And what’s with the ‘we’ business? Fans strut around saying ‘we’ as if they’re a member of the team. You know, ‘we’ kicked their ass. ‘We’ need a tight end. ‘We’ nothing, you sit at home drinking beer and yelling at the television. Period.

Golf is another sport I don’t get. I’m with Twain on this one, his viewpoint being golf is ‘a good walk spoiled.’ I mean, come on, grown men whack a little white ball then chase it, hit it again, chase it some more, and just keep whacking and chasing until the ball rolls into a hole. That’s fun? Crowds of people stand around and watch this nonsense. Jiminy Christmas, how bored do they have to be? Why aren’t there big crowds at tiddlywinks? Same thing, smaller scale.

Okay, I realize I’m talking to myself here, because the entire free world is glued to a television screen watching the Patriots and the Rams fall down and get back up. See that? The fact I even know what teams are playing proves there’s too much coverage. This isn’t information I need or want, it was forced on me. Please, for the love of God, don’t let there be a disputed call or a controversial play. I’ll pull a Van Gogh, I will, I’ll tear my ears off so I won’t have to listen to all the bellyaching. I don’t want to, but I will if I have to.

copyright © 2019 the whirly girl

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18 Responses to “: can someone explain the super bowl to me? :”

  1. Dave Kingsbury

    Haha, rules can be hilarious when you don’t understand them. Rugby football’s even worse and as for Formula One Racing, fergeddit! The green one is in front of the red one, although the red one is really ahead …

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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