Year: 2019
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: yipes, here it comes :
Autumn, with it’s cold, damp, dreary darkness, is preparing for the kill. That’s its entire purpose, you know: to murder summer. To replace our blissful radiance and warmth with grim decay. No wonder I loathe Fall. The mere thought of what lies ahead gives me chills. Months of bitter cold and little daylight. Naked trees.…
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: bandaids are not your friend :
They will out you. First chance they get, those buggers scream, ‘clumsy bonehead walking.’ And you can’t deny it, because the damn proof is right there, stuck to your knee or forehead or wherever. Of course, once the Bandaid has everyone’s attention, the questions start. What did you do? Are you hurt? Why aren’t you…
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: do you ever get on your own nerves? :
Why, yes. Yes, I do. In fact, I’m often at odds with myself, because I’m a pain in my own ass. There’s simply no reason to pretend otherwise. Oh, I can be fun to hang out with occasionally. I’m pretty good company when I try, very entertaining. Other times I just want to strangle me.…
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: here’s a declaration of weakness :
I can’t stop the world from changing in ways I don’t like or leaving me in the dust as it marches past. There, short and to the point, a perfect way to admit you’re powerless. I am, you know, I’m powerless. See how easy it is? I didn’t waste time or money on elaborate preparations,…
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: a bad, bad, terrible impression :
The dog, bless her heart, isn’t terribly bright. She’s trusting, though, and that’s to her everlasting detriment. I sometimes use her naiveté for entertainment purposes: she’ll fall for anything. My newest and most ambitious scam to date is pretending to be Julia Child. Now, anyone who knows me — even a little — knows I…
the whirly girl 