Category: humor
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Aww, crap, not again.
This is ridiculous. I just had a birthday, for crying out loud. I don’t need another one. And when did they start coming bi-monthly? My dear old grandmother, bless her heart, was never entirely sure what year she was born. Lucky woman. These days we not only know the year, but month, day, time, and…
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The Redemptive Nature of Laundry.
It has to be the suds. Or maybe the agitation. No, the dryer. Whatever it is, I like doing laundry. I like turning dirty, balled up clothes into a freshly laundered stack of clean duds. Don’t ask why because I? Don’t know. Checking the pockets yields a jackpot of surprises: forgotten money, a mint, lost…
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Who am I? And who are they?
This is not an existential question. And I don’t have amnesia. But I’m definitely not who I thought I was. For decades I’ve been operating under the mistaken belief that I am a unique, one-of-a-kind dame. I was dead wrong. There are hundreds and hundreds of us, all with the same name on our driver’s…
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Receipts are not our friends.
There are just so many. People keep handing me receipts, even when my hands are full of other stuff. Tell you what, if you want to give me something, make it a twenty, not a receipt. And put it in the bag, please. The other day I had errands to run: the grocery store, veterinarian,…
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Please. Don’t come any closer.
Here it is, a hot, sunny morning heralding the arrival of August. There’s a full month ahead of dog days and warm nights, of heat lightning and shimmering highways, of ice cream cones and lemonade. It’s a sweet, lazy time. But I’m not stoopid, I know what’s coming. And so do you. At the end…
the whirly girl 