Hmm, tough question. On rare occasions, I lean wholeheartedly toward magician, but, no, I’m a full-time resident in the thief camp — more or less. Guess what word broke out of captivity this afternoon, for no particular reason whatsoever. Fanlight. Its arrival stopped me dead in my tracks. Where in the world did it … Continue reading the brain: magician or hostage-taker?
A woodpecker bashes its head into a tree up to 20 times per second or somewhere around 12,000 times a day, give or take. Not softly, either, but at speeds of 13 to 15 miles an hour. Try that once and see if you enjoy the sensation. I’m kidding, the impact would kill you; it's … Continue reading : my kingdom for a woodpecker’s tongue :
My head is no longer a head. It’s a teeming cauldron of germs and bacteria, a giant petri dish of contagion. Synapses and neurons are, for all intents and purposes, marinating in a turbid swamp of noxious microorganisms as we speak. Nothing is moving up there, not thoughts, not impulses, not signals. And I’m left … Continue reading : thar she blows :
No one knows. Their origins are as inscrutable as crop circles and Stonehenge. Oh, plenty of people claim to know the secret; plenty more have a sure-fire, foolproof method for sparking brilliant new thoughts. On demand. At the snap of your fingers. Well, I’m here to tell you, ideas can’t be trained. They don’t come … Continue reading : where do ideas come from? :
There’s been a coup, ladies and gentlemen. My brain, pictured above, has overthrown my thyroid, pictured below, and seized control of operations. Hey, don’t look at me; I’m just as surprised as you are. I had no idea this kind of brouhaha was going on and right under my nose, too. No, it was more … Continue reading : now under new management :