The truth is, I harbor a deep, undying hope Santa is real and have for my whole, entire life. There, I’ve said it and I’m glad. You’re welcome to mock and scoff, because I know it's dumb. My sister outed Santa when I was only 6 and she left absolutely no room for doubt. After … Continue reading : the case for santa claus :
Tag: holidays
: the home alone christmas :
It’s not my first one, either, not by a long shot. They’re all like this, which is to say disastrous. Oddly enough, at some point during the holidays I’ll play almost every role in the movie: the bumbling burglars, the abandoned kid, the scatter-brained, panicky woman, the ill-tempered neighbor, the whole kit and caboodle. These … Continue reading : the home alone christmas :
: a little holiday blasphemy :
Christmas, of course, calls for reverence and awe, deep humility, which is the perfect time to laugh. Curiously, the more inappropriate laughter is to an occasion, the harder and louder we laugh. We snort and choke, struggle mightily to rein in our outbursts, as those around us scowl and cast looks of utter disgust. Adding … Continue reading : a little holiday blasphemy :
: santa isn’t a mind reader :
He doesn’t have a crystal ball, either. You need to tell him what you want for Christmas, otherwise Santa will use his own judgment. Are you good with that? Are you comfortable letting an elderly hermit whose closest friends are elves select your presents? I don’t think you are. He’s a great guy, generous to … Continue reading : santa isn’t a mind reader :
: vive la socks :
Guess what. People aren’t nearly as divided as we think. Oh, we may disagree, we might call each other names, but we all agree on what we want for Christmas. New socks. Those babies are flying out of stores and landing under trees from the mountains to the prairies to the oceans white with foam. … Continue reading : vive la socks :
: reasons to celebrate :
August has an unfair reputation as tedious, a month with no holidays or excitement. Excuse me? Did anyone bother to check the calendar or google or look out a window? August is effing glorious and jam-packed with events. My birthday, for one, is celebrated in August, which makes me a Leo. So don’t argue. Besides it’s … Continue reading : reasons to celebrate :
: fall arrived presorted :
It came in the mail yesterday. The L.L. Bean catalog landed with a thud on my kitchen counter, heralding ‘coziest women’s clothes & more.’ Inside were flannel robes, Ultrasoft Sweats, down comforters, all the trappings for cold, wet, windswept weather. In August, goddam it. Why do retailers insist on raining on our parade? It’s summer, … Continue reading : fall arrived presorted :
: the cold, harsh reality :
Say what you will about the holidays, they’re expensive and exhausting and fattening, but they’re a welcome distraction. See, the holidays keep us occupied, leaving time for little else. We plan and party and decorate, we hang our stockings and deck the halls and toast the New Year. Then, before we know it, poof, they’re … Continue reading : the cold, harsh reality :
the whirly girl 