Wait, whoa, stop screaming. They’re candles, ladies and gentlemen, see the wicks? What did you think it was, a medical experiment? Grisly crime scene photo?
Never, never believe my headlines. I’m a liar, I blow things out of all proportion. That’s how I lure readers; with trickery and deceit in lieu of talent.
As you can see, I’ve been trolling the Internet again. Heck, there’s nothing else to do on a snowy Sunday, except wait for the snowplows and liberation. And that won’t happen until the stoopid snow stops, sometime in June. It just keeps falling, and falling in heaps, I might add. Please, send help, I’m trapped in a snow globe.
I really hate February.
On a positive note, this is the last month of winter. The end. Daylight savings time arrives March 8, bringing sunlight and hope and a reason to live. Hallelujah and yay.
Sorry, back to the candles. I ran across these babies at https://www.etsy.com/shop/uncannyartshop. They’re curiously fun, don’t you think? My favorite is the ears, they remind me of Uncle Fester (of Addams Family fame). Picture one on a bookshelf or, if you’re sadistic, floating in a punch bowl. Or, ooh, in a bed — a la The Godfather.
The Necessary Details:
$18 each; available in 15 different scents and 3 styles (ears, disgusted mouth, happy mouth).
You know, maybe you shouldn’t light them. Way too gruesome after all the melting and dripping and collapsing. yeesh
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